2nd-Grade Teacher Can't Believe How Much Fatter They Keep Getting

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2nd-Grade Teacher Can't Believe How Much Fatter They Keep Getting
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WASHINGTON, PA—With the 2012-2013 academic year beginning this week, longtime James G. Blaine Elementary School teacher Suzanne Pomponio, 39, expressed her astonishment Wednesday at how much fatter her second-graders keep getting.

"I honestly didn't think it was possible for this year's kids to be any fatter than last year's, but boy, was I wrong," Pomponio told reporters, explaining that her students have grown noticeably chunkier in each of her 15 years as an educator. "When they all came in on Monday morning, I really couldn't believe how huge they were. The first thing I thought was, wow, each student must be 8 to 10 pounds heavier than anyone in my 2011 class.

"Sure, there were one or two overweight children in each class when I started teaching, but now every single kid I have is, I hate to say it, just alarmingly obese," said the teacher, explaining that when her students raise their hands to answer questions, the amount of fat hanging off their arms startles her every time. "Most of these kids can't even walk to the bathroom and back without sweating and getting all pink in the face.

Moreover, Pomponio stated that as her students have gotten fatter, an indistinct but foul-smelling odor in the classroom has gotten more and more pronounced."I don't know how to describe it, but it smells like a mixture of sweat and meat of some kind," said Pomponio, adding that while one of her students is no doubt "the jock" of the group, it's impossible to tell whom, given their size.

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