'People pleasers often convince themselves that approval makes them happy, but the inevitable pressure to manage others' emotions can be exhausting and anxiety-inducing.'
and caring to all humanity or screw everyone and tell them what they can go do to themselves.
People pleasers fall into the former category, but worry that if they say “no,” they’ll automatically be shunned. Theirand reputation hinges on every request. Saying yes gives them a sigh of relief and reassures them that they’re good, likeable people. Say no creates guilt, as if they hurt someone or did something bad. But it takes a lot more than saying no to watching your neighbor’s three disrespectful kids while he watches football to break your moral character.
If you’re a people pleaser, you likely have only the best of intentions. Over-apologizing makes you feel better, but it can actually be a tad bit dishonest. Hear me out on this one: apologizing when you did nothing wrong makes it appear as if you were in the wrong. It’s an admission of guilt for ayou didn’t commit. What’s more, it can make it look like others’ outrageous requests or poorly-thought-out actions were reasonable and justified.
To sum it all up, be a people-respecter, not a people pleaser. Never hesitate to do the right thing. When your frail neighbor asks politely, go ahead and shovel her driveway. When your colleague asks, make a donation to get your long-time co-worker aLinkedIn and Facebook image: Dean Drobot/Shutterstock
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