A Black mom in Kansas City: Always watching, always worrying

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A Black mom in Kansas City: Always watching, always worrying
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Being Black in a predominantly white American neighborhood can present many challenges

Kia Breaux, right, plays ball with her sons Jaden, 14, left, and John, 17, in front of their home in Kansas City, Mo., Friday, April 21, 2023. The recent shooting of Black teenager Ralph Yarl by an 84-year-old white man when Yarl mistakenly went to the wrong address in a nearby neighborhood, has shaken many Black residents in the predominantly white region of the city. KANSAS CITY, Mo. — — On April 13, the nightmare that I'd worried about ever since we moved into our neighborhood came true.

I became painfully aware that John shared that fear shortly after Ahmaud Arbery was gunned down by white men while jogging through a Georgia neighborhood in 2020. Like Arbery, John liked to jog through the neighborhood. Now, however, he was asking me to trail him in my car as he jogged through ours. Then there was the time I sent my then-husband to return a casserole dish a neighbor left at my house after a party. The former neighbor, whom we’d known for years at that point, opened the door and yelled, “We don’t want any. Go Away,” and slammed the door. She didn’t take the time to make out the face on the other side of the door. She just saw Black. She apologized profusely when she realized what she had done.

These things happen. You block them out and you move on, but the subtle tension remains. No one wants to talk about it. Eventually you become numb. You avoid certain situations. It’s like walking on eggshells to avoid a landmine. The most troubling incident came when a man we didn’t know rang our doorbell in the middle of the day.

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