“Generally the child’s death is not what a Munchausen-by-proxy mother is seeking. In fact, death removes the object of her deceptions. She can no longer falsify or induce illness in somebody who’s died”
We’ve seen a lot of Munchausen by proxy plotlines onscreen this year, from the twisted pas de deux of Phantom Thread to the devastating child abuse of HBO’s Sharp Objects. Munchausen by proxy is a form of abuse in which a caregiver either fabricates or causes sickness in the person that they are caring for.
Both can be true, but generally the child’s death is not what a Munchausen-by-proxy mother is seeking. In fact, death removes the object of her deceptions. She can no longer falsify or induce illness in somebody who’s died. But I’ve also dealt with cases where mothers just love bereavement festivities, and they fall in love with the attention they get. They enjoy leaving the impression that fate has been terribly unkind to them despite being exemplary parents.
Adora’s focus on other people’s perceptions of her is obviously pathological. I think most of these mothers have real limitations in their love for their children because they objectify their children so much. They see their children as objects to be manipulated. Camille was not a submissive child, and Adora admits, “I never loved you.” She wanted somebody whom she could much more easily objectify and manipulate.
That’s a really good point, yeah. I actually used to study self-mutilation as my main area before I moved to factitious disorder and Munchausen syndrome, and Munchausen by proxy. I became fascinated with why people would cut themselves. I think many of the self-mutilators would love to strike out violently, but they contain their impulses and instead direct them internally.
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