Advice: Begin with compassion, identify the patterns, create consistent boundaries and scaffold instead of accommodate
: one partner takes over decision-making for the other partner, who constantly expresses insecurity and ineptitude while seeking reassurance and approval.
Here’s how to figure out of this describes your loved one and some steps you can take to make it better:must be directed toward yourself and your relationship partner, accepting what each is capable of in a given moment, but working to improve.You might feel anger and frustration toward the anxious person in your life. You might feel guilt. You might be wondering whether you can maintain this relationship.
Setting limits is the best way to help them do this. Without boundaries, your relationship will worsen, and your life will slowly but inexorably become more constricting and frustrating because your own needs won’t be met. High levels of anxiety can make this hard because the impulse is to do whatever it takes to banish it as soon as possible. Your relationship partner and you yourself may fear it’s likely to spiral out of control.to discomfort. We learn to sit with our difficult feelings and build skills to cope with them more effectively. We build emotional skills like we do physical fitness — with practice, and little by little.
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