'I had been taught that, in order to be feminine, I had to be small, light, fragile.'
because she seizes any opportunity to use me for physical labor and because I am the strongest member of my family.
I've always been naturally athletic. I had biceps in preschool. I swam the most laps in kindergarten. I ran faster than the boys in middle school and lapped the other girls in high school. I actually enjoy working out. I love the burn that comes from working new muscles andto be faster, fitter, and more toned. I take pride in my athletic ability.
I'm a medium-size woman with fair skin and blond hair, which means I have the privilege of blending in and not being discriminated against based on the way I look. But in a society that values women based on how little space they can take up, I've always felt that my visible strength isn't desirable.ADVERTISEMENT
There was a time in my life when I wasn't this way. I was flirting with an eating disorder and battling the emotional devastation of a quarter-life crisis. I've found myself longing for the slim look of my arms during that time, or the widening space between my thighs — but there was nothing healthy about the way I was living. And, much to my personal embarrassment, I couldn't do a push-up and could barely run a mile.
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