Laura Gene tells Newsweek about how a yoga group led her to completely rejecting Western medicine.
At the beginning, I believe these women were genuinely trying to help me out. I mentioned during the introductory session that the obstetrician may be putting me on anti-anxiety medication and they were horrified by that.
I thought:"These people at the yoga studio are the only people who have my best interest in mind. They were right about this, so they are probably going to be right about other things. I need to trust them more." I didn't see any of the red flags. All I saw was anxiety relieving techniques and people who cared about me. This was the only community I had, I wasn't close to my childhood family growing up and we didn't have any relatives living nearby. This was my community; I saw these people every single day.
The hospital needed all my medical records from her, but she wouldn't pick up the phone. The worst part was they didn't know the results of my Group B Strep test, so they were going to give me and my baby antibiotics as a precaution, which I thought was a death sentence. During my labor I thought I was dying and I still did not trust these people. I was so convinced they were against me that I put my life and my baby's life at huge risk. Looking back, that was the moment I was the frog boiling to death, I just didn't know it.
I was very proud I had delivered my baby vaginally, even though he was breech. My son survived, so I thought that any mother could do the same thing and if they didn't, I wouldn't say they were lazy outright, but that was ultimately the judgment I would make. They told me I had to try harder, for longer. They suggested all these supplements and natural herbs and said if I hadn't tried everything, why would I take the easy way out with pharmaceuticals, which would mess up my whole life. To them, that was the lazy route of motherhood. I didn't want to be a bad mom, I didn't want to do the wrong thing, so I just kept trying.
For the first year after leaving the community, I only changed small stuff, which made it felt like I was improving a little bit. I was vaccinating my kids, but in the back of my mind I still wondered if I was doing the right thing. I was worried that I had become polarized from this group, but might not be doing the right thing.After two years, I got medicated for my anxiety. It was like a little switch went off and suddenly my brain had the correct chemicals to operate. Everything changed.
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