'I got to force-feed myself like I force-fed her.'
shortly before she died. In Duane's first interview since the tragedy, he revealed how he's coping with her loss.."I could cry talking about crying. . . So manning up would be, not 'get over it,' but 'face it.'"
Although Duane is trying to be strong, he confessed that it isn't easy—and it's taking a toll on his health. The reality star revealed he has had no appetite since his wife's death and lost"17 pounds in two weeks."Duane is also struggling to accept Beth's final wishes. "I've never done ashes in my life, and that’s what she wanted," he explained, gesturing to a small pink urn containing his wife's remains."This is the most morbid stuff. It’s like, morbid."
"[Beth] said scatter some [ashes], leave some on the fireplace. Of course when I go to heaven, she wants me in the box with her," Duane went on."I was going to do all the scattering. . .and then I looked at [her ashes] and I thought, 'I’m not going to throw you away. Just throw you away and start over? I can’t do that.'"
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