DearPrudie: He was very upset by my reaction and also implied that I am overreacting. Help!
You are not overreacting and Alex should never have told you that you were. I’m sorry that he had the reaction he did and that it’s continuing to affect you negatively. Alex is putting a lot of responsibility for his feelings on you, which is wrong and suggests that he really hasn’t internalized what was wrong about his past behavior. You are right to sever this friendship and you can do it in whatever way feels safest for you.
Alex’s feelings are his responsibility, full stop. He can change and grow and feel bad and still none of that entitles him to your friendship. He’s not in a place right now to be a good friend to you and that’s what I’m most concerned about. Moreover, you aren’t responsible for keeping Alex from getting embittered toward women and nothing you do can “make” him take a swan dive into misogyny. He has work to do on himself; you don’t have to be present for it.
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