Dear Prudie: She said I've been perfect, but she has some fears.
I have a 5-month-old baby. My mother came to help out when he was born, and my husband and I are grateful to her for that. But we both began to notice while she was here that she would disparage my ability to breast-feed. I didn’t think that much of it, even though my husband felt she wanted to be holding our son more than I did. Now when she visits she routinely says that my son is “making do” with the mother he has, that it’s unfortunate for him that she isn’t around us most of the time.
Whatever is fueling her behavior, you have to do something because it’s intolerable and is ruining your relationship with her. Instead of boasting about what a great mother she was back when, she needs to start being a great mother to you now. If she doesn’t put a lid on it, you will have to put a lid on her visits, and then everyone loses because your son will miss having the close presence of an loving grandmother. So the next time she comes, prepare yourself to speak up.
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