‘How Do You Get Over Someone?’

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‘How Do You Get Over Someone?’
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  • 📰 NYMag
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HolaPapi: 'Do you think you’ve ever gotten over anyone? Because I don’t think I have.' jpbrammer responds

Illustration: Pedro Nekoi Do you think you’ve ever gotten over anyone? Because I don’t think I have. Whenever I ask my friends I’m always hoping they will say no. I want to commiserate because at this point in my life I can’t imagine ever feeling a sense of content detachment as I look back on past relationships. Even as I try to reassure myself that there are valid, non-malicious reasons they had to come to their ends, I cling to the best parts of them, as if nothing will be that good again .

Omitted, of course, are all the things between those peaks. I’ve all but forgotten the anxiety that came with wondering if this guy was going to leave me, wondering if I was really ready to be monogamous with him, and the bumps and bruises that come with being in any relationship. When everything else was whittled away, what I was left with was a sculpture of my own design. It was made of real stuff, yes, but my biases had twisted it into a more alluring shape.

It also helps us with the not-so-great memories. I mean, I often feel nostalgic for the times my Abuela left me in the casino parking lot with my Gameboy Color to go play slots. I remember vividly smelling like chlorine from my swimming practice at the YMCA, looking for rare Pokémon in the grass. I view it as a simpler time when I had fewer problems. And yet, I would not like to be sitting in a hot car in a casino parking lot right now.

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