How to Have Great Conversations

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How to Have Great Conversations
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People tend to underestimate their conversational skills. Here's why—and how to stop.

suggests that people are too quick to pull the plug on a good conversation — thinking, mistakenly, that conversations that last for more than a few minutes are perceived as“Having a good conversation is one of daily life’s most rewarding experiences and yet people are often hesitant to set aside significant amounts of time for conversation because they are concerned that they will run out of things to talk about and that their conversation will grow dull or awkward,” says Michael Kardas, a...

To do so, the researchers recruited pairs of strangers to have conversations with each other in an experimental setting. The researchers paused the conversations every few minutes and asked participants how they felt the conversations were going.

Interestingly, the researchers found no evidence of a drop-off in interest or enjoyability as the conversation continued. “People found more material to talk about as the conversations continued than they had expected, and they enjoyed themselves more than they anticipated,” says Kardas. “This mistaken assumption that people will run out of material to discuss in conversation might keep people from having longer and more meaningful conversations that might also lead them to form stronger relationships.”

Moreover, the authors found no evidence that their results were contingent on whether someone spoke with a person of the same or opposite

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