I Finally Understand The 4 Final Words Spoken In 'Gilmore Girls'

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I Finally Understand The 4 Final Words Spoken In 'Gilmore Girls'
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'When 'Gilmore Girls' premiered, I reveled in the fact that I already had the Lorelai to my Rory.'

Illustration: Jianan Liu/HuffPost; Photo: Alamyin November 2016, the same week my mom found out she had stage 4 cancer.

That Friday afternoon, our love of those wonderfully imperfect characters and our desire to escape into the comforting world of Stars Hollow pulled us to the TV. I curled up on the couch, and my mom situated herself in a chair with a heating pad. Out of the corner of my eye, I noted every time she shifted, knowing she was in pain, wishing I could do something to help her. But I couldn’t.

Still, despite the issues we had with the revival, we were grateful to return to the world of “Gilmore Girls,” and Lorelai and Rory remained the paradigm for our relationship during the next two years, as my mom’s disease progressed and her body began to shut down, and she entered hospice care.When she moved into an inpatient facility, she was put in a private room, but it was sterile, with beige walls and harsh overhead lights.

Now, four years after my mom’s death, I finally understand that the final exchange — “Mom?” “Yeah.” “I’m pregnant.” — is the blueprint I was looking for. Those four words that my mom and I had spent years waiting to hear are as close as “Gilmore Girls” will ever get to showing the generation of girls like me — the ones who grew up seeing themselves as Rorys — that they will one day lose their Lorelais.

It’s hard to remember, when you’re in the thick of the missing, that these losses are a part of a larger something. It’s hard to imagine the green buds that will form on empty, brown branches, or hear “There She Goes” in a pilot and foresee that it will become the background music to Rory’s life if she becomes a mom.Saeed Adyani/Netflix

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