A 34-year-old woman on getting a clothing allowance: 'My parents basically insisted on not cutting me off, even when I had the means to be financially independent'
Living With Money explores the personal side of personal finance: how our bank balances do and don’t define who we are.
From an early age, I’ve always been fixated on saving money as a point of pride. As kids, my parents offered us a choice: We could either get an allowance — like, $10 a week or something — and spend it on whatever we wanted, or we could get no allowance and they’d pay for everything but we had to run our purchases by them first. My sisters were like, “I don’t want an allowance.
I got married pretty young, and around that time my mom started worrying that I was being too tight with money, and that I was “depriving” myself of nice things just for the sake of being frugal — as ridiculous as that sounds. I think she was also worried that my husband wouldn’t treat me like the queen they thought I was, at least in the material sense. When it comes to gifts, my parents go big or go home, and that’s not how my husband or his family are.
If my mom sees me not buy something that I want, she will not let it go. For example, when those Valentino Rockstud shoes first came out a few years ago, I made the mistake of eyeing them when I was out shopping with her. She asked me if I wanted them, and I said that they just doesn’t seem like a worthwhile purchase. And she just latched onto it and was constantly giving me shit.
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