Dear How to Do It: I think my boyfriend might be gay, and I have the receipts. What do I do now?
I’m not sure what questions you’re asking, so I’m relieved to hear that you believe you’ve answered them yourself. While you’re here, though, I’ll give you my thoughts.
If you want to stay with this guy, you’re probably going to need to work on broadening and nuancing your framing. If you don’t want to stay with him, I’m not sure why you’re writing.I have always had rape fantasies. I am a straight woman in my 30s, a feminist, and have a successful career in a highly technical field. I was never abused as a child, nor have I ever experienced coercive sex in my own life.
I know that rape fantasies aren’t uncommon, but is it usual that this is the only thing that has ever gotten me off? Every time I approach orgasm , it is to one of these fantasies, whether I am by myself or with a partner. I can enjoy sex very much in the moment, but I can’t quite get over the hump without withdrawing into a fantasy in my head.
If you feel significantly distressed by your fetish—which it seems like you might—I suggest you consider seeing a specifically kink-friendly mental health professional. There’s a whole directory of them online. A pro can help you work through your complicated feelings and reiterate that you are OK.
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