Dear Care and Feeding: The “industrial sports complex” is really getting to me.
I need help getting over the hatred I have for watching my kid’s sporting events. My son has played basketball for many years. We have poured countless hours, days, and weekends into practices and games. Since the “industrial sports complex” has hijacked any semblance of what I grew up with , we have been beholden to year-round endeavors with competitive sports teams that are expensive and time consuming, all so he could make the high school team, which he really wanted to do .
He is quite tall, but not very coordinated. He works super hard at the sport. He practiced every day during the pandemic by himself and has rarely missed a practice or game in all the years he has played. I think he makes the teams he has tried out for because of his height. He barely gets any playing time. I am at a point where I sit in the stands and fight back tears as I watch him sit on the bench.
Can you please tell me something that will reframe this so I can maybe get to a place where I don’t want to cry every time I’m there? I don’t mind driving him to practice. I think team sports are a wonderful thing for kids. It’s helping him stay physically healthy and helping him form great bonds with teammates and all that important stuff. I played every sport I could get my hands on growing up, was super athletic, and loved the games.
First off, I know that it’s heartbreaking to invest a ton of time and money into a sport only to sit in the crowd and not watch your kid play. I always attend my daughters’ games, and I witness the disappointment in the eyes of parents when their kids don’t get off of the bench, so you’re clearly not alone in feeling this way. Every sports parent wants to see their kid perform in games.
The one thing that wasn’t clear in your letter is how the lack of playing time in games impacts your son.
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