Moral Injury and the Agony and Power of Love

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Moral Injury and the Agony and Power of Love
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'Healing hearts requires a holistic process of reconnection to self-worth and life-sustaining relationships.'

and our sense of agency in the world. When it passes judgment against us or others, it generates inner conflict . Its emotions are so powerful and destructive that facing them is akin to sitting in a consuming fire that threatens our very existence. Only when we can feel, acknowledge, and share our emotional pain with others by sitting in that fire, can we burn clean and rise from the ashes to find new meaning in life, like the fabled ancient Phoenix that emerges from its own ashes renewed.

No one can rise from the ashes to build a new moral identity without relationships, without love. Therein lies a paradox about those suffering from moral injury. Many with moral injury may not share their experiences with their families and friends out of concern that they may contaminate them with their own terrible memories. They may fear they will be judged and rejected. They may also worry their anger will overtake them.Such hesitations are not unwarranted.

Reconciling difficult truths, honoring pain, transforming ways of thinking and being, and restoring moral integrity require, in part, trustworthy people who can listen to moral suffering empathetically even when words may be lacking, and hearts are crushed. Trustworthy listeners enable the telling and retelling of moral injury experiences.

As moral injury is processed, it can be integrated into life stories that put moral injury into larger narratives of relationships. As the stories are told and evolve, sharing them becomes easier without retraumatizing suffers or traumatizing listeners. The sharing can then deepen bonds of love and open possibilities for a future worth living into together.

for everyone who has been burned by moral injury so they can move forward in life strengthened and renewed and better equipped for the challenges of life that are inevitable.

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