'It wasn’t that I was totally crazy or out of control. But I felt that I was bad, almost morally defective. That feeling ate away at my sense of self like battery acid. In fact, it ruined it.'
kids, since the first grade. Teachers knew it and my classmates did, too: Jonathan Mooney was kind of crazy. As one of those kids, I made friends with the janitor, the only visitor at my desk in the hallway. And I was on a first-name basis with Shirley, the receptionist in the principal’s office.
Some of my worst memories were at the dinner table, when my father would shout, “Jon, stop it, stop it. Jon, what’s wrong with you?” He taught me that movement was somehow shameful. The same thing happened in the classroom. My second-grade teacher, named Mrs. C., would stop the class, point at me, and say, “Jon, what is wrong with you?” In that moment, the myth that good kids sit still — and bad kids don’t — labeled me as a kid with a problem.
Attention deficit disorder isn’t a deficit. I pay attention to too much. Outside the confines of a classroom, my “restlessness” and my attention to detail are gifts. I have traveled across the country, published two books, and started a family. Those who have been diagnosed with ADHD should celebrate it. The gift has its challenges — and we have to work around those challenges — but it isn’t a pathology. That’s a powerful thought for a kid who feels that ADHD makes him second-rate, or worse.
Also, my teachers weren’t all Mrs. Cs. A number of teachers recognized my strengths and created environments in which I could excel. That made all the difference. One third-grade teacher, Mr. R., validated my real dislike for my previous school experiences. His honest approach to what really mattered — my education — allowed both of us to focus on my learning rather than the mastery of the institution’s idea of “good.
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