Because we are all equal parents, no specific roles limit our caregiving.
Our son Wilder will be starting kindergarten in the fall and we recently toured his classroom. As we gathered in the back of the room with other parents, the teacher went around with a list of children’s names introducing herself. When she called Wilder’s name, four of us approached. She stood there silently puzzled for a moment before asking “Which of you are Wilder’s parents?” I answered first, as I often do, “All of us.
The man that I approached happened to be a friend of ours, named Lee. One night after a comedy show, I walked up to him at the bar and sheepishly asked, “This may sound very strange, but would you ever consider co-parenting with me?” Over the sound of a scratchy mic and a chorus of hecklers, I heard him say, “Yes.”
Lee and I began what we thought would be at least a six-month-to-a-year journey. In an extraordinary twist of fate, I became pregnant the first time we tried; at home with only a specimen cup, a needle-less syringe and a wealth of knowledge from lesbian pregnancy blogs on the internet. Our early entry into parenthood shaped our on-going relationships, and Wilder’s time was easily divided between our two households. We developed a family schedule, which has grown more complex over the years ― it now includes after-school activities and never-ending invitations to children’s birthday parties.
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