New Music Festival Just Large Empty Field To Do Drugs In

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New Music Festival Just Large Empty Field To Do Drugs In
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MOUNT STERLING, KY—Declaring the event a rousing success so far, organizers confirmed more than 45,000 people turned out Wednesday for the first annual Cavalcade Folk and Roots Festival, a four-day gathering that consists solely of a big empty field to do drugs in.

Held on a farm in the foothills of eastern Kentucky, the festival, which continues through Friday and features no live performances of any kind, reportedly offers “something for every type of music lover,” specifically a fenced-off, 300-acre pasture in which to consume a broad array of mind-altering substances.

“I always worry I’ll miss out on something at big festivals like this, because there’s never enough time to do all the drugs.

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