Plus how to actually do it—with sample scripts
There are few social interactions more panic-inducing than the moment a kind, friendly person invites you to do an activity or attend an event that you really don’t care to do but you also don’t have a good reason to say no.a kind and friendly person, so you aren’t going to justthat.
Beyond that I look at saying no to hangout requests as a gateway drug to setting boundaries in general. When you realize that you have the right and the ability to say “no thanks” or “I’m not into that” without the world coming to an end it's pretty life-changing.
Regardless of what you say, your tone matters a lot; aim for warm, but relatively neutral and matter-of fact. And keep itThere’s also no need to beg for forgiveness, get into all your boring personal reasons, or present an eight-part defense as though you’re ADA Alexandra Cabot in aIf it’s date-specific, and you’d prefer to be doing Not This on the day/time in question:
You could also add something like, “But I’d love to see you and catch up soon! How about [some alternative programming that you both enjoy]?”“Ah, I’d love to [see you/catch up/hang out], but I haven’t been able to get much time for myself lately and I promised myself I’d just hunker down and have a quiet weekend!”
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