DearPrudie: Plantation weddings, poisoned dildos, and the year’s other greatest hits.
My wife, Sheila, came across your column from May 25 and immediately suspected that the letter writer who was pressured into having an abortion was our daughter Rose. Rose confirmed this. I’m “Ian,” Rose’s father. Rose’s pregnancy would always have been a disappointment, and I stand by my belief that she did not comprehend the enormity of the decision she faced. But the way I approached her confession, and the way I treated my family afterward, was unacceptable.
When I returned home I threw myself into being the father my children deserved. I’ve remained sober since, but I was still invested in protecting myself. I never apologized to Rose. I never explained my motivations or that my anger was cruelly misdirected. I convinced myself that if I were a good-enough father, I could fix what I’d broken. I’m not saying that teenage pregnancy is positive or that Rose was responsible enough for a baby.
Shortly after you published Rose’s letter, our family had its first honest conversation in a long time. Rose was heartbroken and furious with me. She is also angry with her mother. We understand and respect this. Rose is seeking counseling, as are Sheila and I. We are exploring the possibility of family counseling after Rose’s baby is older, but that is entirely up to Rose. I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for publishing Rose’s letter.
I am going to travel. I am going to visit exotic places, drink wine, and learn a foreign language. I have enough money to be quite comfortable for the rest of my life. I would rather shoot myself than ever get married again. My family acts like I am an idiot—they have all sorts of “concerns” about my emotional state, since I not mourning adequately and pearl-clutching over my plans . They keep telling me I need to take time and get “my head on straight.
Obviously, anyone can change her name to whatever she wants, but this seems weird. But what can I do? Tell my fiancée? Try to talk to my ex about it? Just agree with people that it is really weird? I could take my fiancée’s last name, but we both really like my surname, and I’m worried that if there’s something odd going on with my ex that it will just be postponing the real issue.
México Últimas Noticias, México Titulares
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