When children have to help take on the role of being a parent when their own parents are unable to, they can seem outwardly mature but struggle with anxiety internally. Here's how therapy can help, explains drahonaguha
—this is a subtle form of parentification as a child takes on the task of supporting and maintaining their parent's psychological integrity, which is an adult task.
Parentification can involve a range of behaviours, from the overt—making children engage in physical tasks that typically fall to adults in the family, including tasks such as cooking and cleaning[1], caring for siblings or caring for the parent themselves, to the subtler—confiding in a child in a manner that is not age-appropriate, seeking emotional support from a child, expecting tasks of a child beyond their developmental capacity, seeking advice from children, using them as mediators or...
In emotionally healthy families, parents recognise that their role involves caring for a child, meeting the child’s developmental needs, scaffolding a child to build new skills, and supporting individuation and separation from the family. Within families characterised by parentification, the emotional emphasis remains on the parents physical and psychological needs, which typically results in children operating at a level far beyond their developmental capacity.
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