CUPERTINO, CA—Muttering “Come on, come on” under his breath as he attempted to bind the two objects together, an unprepared Tim Cook was frantically taping a battery to a pair of sunglasses ahead of his keynote at the Apple Worldwide Developers Conference, sources confirmed Monday. “I’ll call them, uh, the all-new…
CUPERTINO, CA—Muttering “Come on, come on” under his breath as he attempted to bind the two objects together, an unprepared Tim Cook was frantically taping a battery to a pair of sunglasses ahead of his keynote at the Apple Worldwide Developers Conference, sources confirmed Monday.
“I’ll call them, uh, the all-new Apple Lookers—or no, how about the Apple Eye Mirrors?’ said the company’s CEO, who wiped a bead of sweat off his forehead and cried out ‘Just a minute!’ from behind stage as he struggled to tear off a piece of duct tape with his teeth. “Goddammit, why didn’t anyone tell me this thing was today? If they ask too many questions, I’ll tell them it’s a prototype. Too bad there’s not any time to paint them. I have some white-out in my desk that would have looked great.
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