Unwitting Republican Man Now the Face of Reusable Tote Bags

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Unwitting Republican Man Now the Face of Reusable Tote Bags
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Steve Castor, the goon hired to steer Republicans through the impeachment hearings, made a sudden pivot to influencer and trendsetter when he was spotted wandering into Congress this morning with a tote bag that read: “Live, Eat, Shop, Reuse.” Considering how antithetical this mantra was to everything Republicans stand for—specifically recycling, or the ability to live—the bag shocked many in attendance. George Conway, best known as the xenomorph that burst out of that dude’s chest in Alien, and also husband of fellow extraterrestrial Kellyanne Conway, remarked on Twitter: “I hope the security screeners checked it for tofu and kale.”

somewhere between broken glass being scraped across a chalkboard, andblasts through its speakers? Turns out it was neither of those things!

reports that, was caught heckling Judiciary Committee ChairmanAccording to the outlet, Shroyer screamed: “Jerry Nadler and the Democrat Party are committing treason against this country! We voted for! And they’re simply removing him because they don’t like him!” Other illuminating tidbits include, “You’re the one committing treason!” and “Trump is innocent!” Sure, dude!

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