One way to help: offer something tangible or specific (like bringing dinner).
To mark Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, POPSUGAR compiled testimonies from 22 women* who have experienced miscarriage. We started our conversations with a simple question: what do you wish people understood about pregnancy loss? The wisdom they shared in response was raw and real. May we heed their words, erase the stigma, and break the silence.
Sarah, 36, appreciated receiving a text from a friend that read simply"F*CK THAT" because, in her own words,"Really, what else is there to say other than 'F*CK. THAT?'" Now, when she hears from friends experiencing their own miscarriage, she tries to"support them wherever they're at, whether it's sitting and crying, screaming together, encouraging them to punch something, etc.
"An unexpected part to miscarriage is having to manage others' reactions to the news," said one woman."Going through a loss and also informing family of it often requires the person to both grieve and console at the same time. It's a hard balance that carries a lot of weight." Rachel, 44, who is still recovering from a miscarriage she had just last week, mentioned how much babysitting would help as she struggles to parent while grieving.Many women remembered the items friends and family brought them in the wake of their loss: care packages of food, candles, movies, books, soft blankets, and thoughtful cards.
Aimee Baron, MD — who, after her own miscarriages , began supporting women in her own community througha miscarriage, even if all signs point to normal."A piece of me broke each time [I miscarried]. The thought of starting over, not knowing what was wrong, and getting older, not knowing if the next pregnancy would have a perfect embryo . . . It took a huge toll on me specifically but also on [my whole family].
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