What ‘And Just Like That…’ Gets Wrong About Young Adults’ Gender Identity That ‘Better Things’ Gets Right

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What ‘And Just Like That…’ Gets Wrong About Young Adults’ Gender Identity That ‘Better Things’ Gets Right
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What AndJustLikeThat gets wrong about young adults’ gender identity that BetterthingsFX gets right

, ultra-femme, fussy protagonist Charlotte is flummoxed when her younger child, Rose, starts asking to be called “Rock,” going by they/them pronouns, disdaining their all-pink bedroom, and cutting their hair short. Rock’s nascent identity is dismissed as a “phase” by everyone from their father, Harry—he is appalled when Rock’s teacher gently affirms their gender identity—to Charlotte’s friend Anthony, himself a gay man.

as Rock’s trans rabbi, it’s clear throughout the season that this show wants to emphasize that Rock’s shift is causing the York-Goldenblatt family some serious strife., but it’s also a painful reminder to many of us across the LGBTQ+ spectrum that our stories are not our own; they are catalysts for the people in our lives to react to as they will.

A few episodes later, Frankie is flirting with a girl at the “Batceañera” she insisted on having, dressed in lipstick and a suit, and Sam seems to be coming to terms with not being able to pin down Frankie’s gender or sexual identity. As Drew Gregoryat Autostraddle, “One day Frankie is a boy, the next she’s a girl and having sex with a boy. Someday she might be a boy having sex with a girl. Sam doesn’t get to control that. She can only control how she responds.

Not everything that kids do is legible to their parents, whether those kids are cis and straight or queer and gender-nonconforming or claim any other identity.

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