Thinking of reaching out to old friends but nervous it will be awkward or that they won't appreciate it? You should make those phone calls or send a text or email, according to new research.
— Thinking of reaching out to old friends but nervous it will be awkward or that they won’t appreciate it? You should make those phone calls or send a text or email, according to new research.
“It’s often less about these kinds of grand overtures that we can make in our relationships and more about the small moments of letting a friend know that we’re thinking of them,” said Miriam Kirmayer, a clinical psychologist and friendship expert who was not involved in the study. “Those types of small reach-outs with lower stakes can go a long way towards strengthening relationships early on, getting a friendship off the ground and maintaining them over time,” Kirmayer said.Friendships require nourishment, sociologist Anna Akbari said. But a variety of insecurities can prevent us from reaching out, said Akbari, who was not involved in the study.
People can also combat fear by putting themselves in their friends’ shoes and thinking about how they would feel if they received the contact, said Marisa Franco, a psychologist and assistant clinical professor at the University of Maryland and author of the forthcoming book “Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make — and Keep — Friends.” She was not involved in the study.
However, using social media isn’t the most natural form of communication and can often lead to more surface-level conversations, Akbari said.
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