Dear Amy: My book club has brunch before each meeting, with each hostess providing all the food. I am gluten intolerant and wonder what is the best way to ask if the host is serving anything I can eat.
I have “gone to the rescue” many times to help people who were needy or suicidal or addicted and in need of therapy or treatment.Recently one of my children told me that since I derive happiness from helping others, that I am really selfish and that my actions are no more laudable than other people who pursue happiness through other selfish means.
The point being that this identity might prevent you from relating to people who don’t have Big Problems, and you might neglect some people in your life who would love to have your full attention without having to be in crisis in order to get it. These days, it is becoming more common for hosts to ask guests in advance if they have any food-related allergies or sensitivities.In the absence of this query, you should contact that meeting’s host in advance: “I can’t eat food containing gluten, and so I hope it will be OK with you if I bring along my own food to eat with the group.”
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